Tuesday, March 09, 2004

Gary the Paper yankee

Today Gary Sheffield decided to go ahead and play with his torn ligament. Perfect. The more spring training games he plays, the more real games he'll end up missing. Also, I remembered hearing something about ligaments recently, but couldn't pinpoint it. Then it came to me. The other day I was watching some of Paper Lion, the movie about George Plympton's attempt to play football, starring that dude from M*A*S*H as Plympton, and Webster's dad, George Papadopolus, as himself. By himself I mean Alex Karras.
So to sum up, Alex who later played George on Webster, played Alex, while George was played by Alan Alda, who also played Hawkeye on M*A*S*H. Wait a minute, Alex Karras played his college ball for Iowa--the Hawkeyes. So Alex, the Hawkeye, who played George P., played Alex, and Alan, who played Hawkeye, played George P. ....

Anyway, in the movie, Karras and another player were trying to convince Plympton to quit for his own safety. And their final stern warning is something to the effect of, "Watch out for the ligaments--the ligaments don't heal."

Come to think of it, I just mentioned Webster's dad the other day. Lys asked me to get on a chair to change a lightbulb, and I reminded her of the time when Webster--in what I can assure you was a VERY special episode--walked in on George and M'am in their bedroom while George was doing some sexy dance on the bed for M'am. And when they asked Webby what he thought was happening, he said, "George was changing a lightbulb."

So my point is, just watch out the next time you're changing a lightbulb, Mr. Sheffield.

Or something.

In other news, a piece of misinformation that I've already told you about was repeated today. Sweeney Murti (green reporter turned yankee shill) was on the FAN this morning, and when he started talking about the yankee bullpen, I knew exactly what was coming. And Sweeney didn't dissapoint. "With Quantrill and Gordon..." Go ahead, give us that magic number... "...and Gabe White, a lot of folks I've talked to around baseball say the yankees are back to playing SIX INNING GAMES."
Where have I heard that before? Only now Gabe White is included in the mix. Maybe that's the REAL key to making it a six inning game--Gabe White! Certainly didn't help today as White is tagged for 7 runs--including a HR for J. D. Drew, his 5th in 5 games for the Braves. I love when ex-yankees achieve success. Know that Steinbrenner's black heart skips an irregular beat every time someone he let get away does good.

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Location: Rhode Island, United States