Wednesday, December 08, 2010

Watch Zack Hample Dissect A Baseball

Pretty cool. Of course, the thing I always think about is how a cow is used in this process. You can see all those non-animal innards that are key to the ball. So when putting the final cover on, why not use, I don't know, anything else? Instead we've got men Michael Vicking the hell out of an animal hide with a stick and nobody seems to mind. Oh right, it's already dead--well how do you think it died, natural causes? Get with the 90s, or whatever the current decade is, MLB.

Then I think, Wait, what if they really did go around finding cows who died of natural causes and then taking their skin to use for baseballs? I wouldn't be offended by that--BUT, in that case, they should do it with human hide, too. I'd donate my skin for that! There could be a little baseball symbol on my license. Hopefully by then the people sewing my nutsack together with somebody else's boob-skin will be paid more than two cents a day--another current travesty surrounding the baseball.

Hey, imagine if you had an arm amputated, and then donated it to MLB, and that arm had a very distinctive birthmark. And then you were at a game, and you caught a foul ball, and on it was the birthmark! And you caught it with your new, prosthetic arm!


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Location: Rhode Island, United States